Session 1B | Nov 11, 2015
Nice work! Good composition, and nice combination of visuals and meanings. The only weak spot is the use of text, but I will talk about that in detail on Monday.
Meanwhile, I made some suggestions, please see the below images that the following comments refer to.
– Don’t overlap text and the visuals, unless this comes from very particular concept. In your case, “Back Home” text and the birds are visually fighting.
– I decided for greater impact to put all text in the black area. To do this, I moved your composition upwards to in a way comply more to the rule of 1/3 (see the red horizontal lines). Now the title is very near the center of the screen which gives it more importance.
– The title is left-aligned with the prominent visual element which is the tower on your photo. Then the size (width) of the text is adjusted so that the title also gets centered on page (see the red lines and arrows indicating same distance to left and the right edges).
– Text is grouped for meaning: title with your name, and gallery name with its address. You already sensed in your sketch that this is a good way to go, I just made it more obvious. Also, the color and the size of the text establish hierarchy which helps easier reading.
– Text is aligned in such way to provide for a composition that complements the tower. In a way the text forms a figure that’s a “mirrored” image of the tower. For best explanation, see the blue area that gets created by the effect of “closure”. Note how the gallery text and the dates is aligned both with the title as well as between themselves.
– I added a little white area near the right edge of the screen, as it looked it could help composition “breathe”. It also feels good having it as a juxtaposition to the vertical of the tower.
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